Note to self:-

Spicy chilli beef steak noodle soup + 2 bottles of cold milkshake = diarrhea for one night.

How am I right now? Not so good.

Firstly, I’m emo-ing, not the kind of emotion that people tend to mistaken as suffering from severe depression and anxiety due to the huge lost in life that people like to call ‘emo’. The ‘emo’ I meant is that I don’t seem to care or pay any attention to the surrounding happenings. Imperial or UCAS has not reply me yet, and I’m very very very impatient about it.

This sucks, it has been 3 weeks already since the interview. Should I call them?

Secondly, the January exam results will be released this Thursday. God knows how bad my grades will be, as I honestly say that I didn’t do very well in them. Didn’t quite manage to finish some papers and have been unable to answer some of the question. If you gave me the chance to blame on something or someone, I would blame Almighty. No offense, I’m not pointing out your God, it could well be my imaginary friends or someone out there that has been listening to my every praying words.

Lastly, I’ve spent over £3000 within 4 months and I’m feeling so bloody guilty about it. All my parent’s hard earned money have been wisely and unwisely wasted, and I’m not even sure whether they expect the balance £1000 to last for the next 2 months. So my father was right after all, it wasn’t enough.

France, here we come!!

Will probably update with photos next week.

Til then, au revoir~

I came back from college with exhaustion, thinking….. everyone’s enjoying themselves at the party held by the student committees (well, most of them), while some are enjoying at the piano concert which I have to be honest that I was disappointed of Calvin rushing to invite people and left me out from the list. Now that 99% of the people I’m good with are at their respective happy places, going on msn was completely pointless.

Lying on the bed with my iPod playing Jay Chou’s I’m Not Worthy, staring at the depressing Mediterranean gray sky, recalling back of the thoughts of how much I screwed my Imperial interview that still drags me to the pool of dismay, I found out that I still have a pile of notes at the corner of my room that I should have sorted out last October, LOL. So, why not take that free time and sort it out, even Jay Chou’s severe-frog-croaking oh-so-fabulous-voice as prescribed to most ladies had turned to be dull and boring once you repetitively listen to it.

Just so I was sorting them out, one piece of paper caught my attention. It was my 2nd year in college resolution list that I made during the summer before I left England back to Malaysia. Boy, and I thought my host would have got rid of it during my absence, and maybe she actually looked at it, the thought of it creeps the every hair on my skin – what must she been thinking of me. Anyhow, looking back through list, the nostalgic thoughts just curved a smile on my face. It’s probably because I’ve overcame some of the obstacles that I’ve longed to get rid of it.

Here are some of the resolutions:-

1. Grow taller. I must admit that I have certainly failed to do this. Height’s one of the important factor in the coming adultery life if you wish to stand out in society, yet alone that it may as well block out huge potential partners in the future. Some junior girls in my college are in fact same height of taller than me. Damn!

2. Improve verbal skill, adapt Oxfordshire English. Hahaha, I’m still sticking to my Malaysian accent, though British accent may have helped me a lot during my university interviews. Verbal skills, on the other hand, I’m not so sure myself. What I had in mind was improve my English to an extent so good that it brings Shakespeare down to his knees. I confess that Jia Li was the source of inspiration that initiated me to all this messed-up english-improvement thingee.

3. Spend less, start saving money. LOL, I wasted 3500 UK Pounds within 4 months! Oh comon’, don’t tell me you can resist not buying anything with that sort of money with no one to resist you. Now it’ isn’t my fault that I inherited some of my mother’s shopping-spree genetic traits, is it? And it gets worse, I wasted about 2000 UK Pounds since last December 2007.

4. Change, wasted the 1st year of college, don’t waste the 2nd one. During the 1st year in college, I was a sad, pathetic, desperate, lascivious, love-seeking moron. When summer holiday was approaching to its end, I never wanted to go back England. The 1st year made me miserable and sad, and I feared it would happened again in the 2nd year, resolving this were thought to be inexplicable. I wouldn’t say that I’ve entirely overcome my previous persona, but I’m really glad that the 2nd year didn’t turned out to be that bad. The girl that I’d crawled for during the 1st year, is currently one of the closest college mate of mine now.

There are a lot more, but I’m keeping them personal.

And I just realised that 2/3 of the list remained unsolved….

…..

…

..

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Ah fuck them, why do I bother.

Edit: The word fuck reminds me of lunch today with Julia, Sonia and Joanne. Julia proposed that the word FUCK, is the abbreviation for Fornication Under Consent of the King. The first thought came to my mind was “Man, I never knew English was that interesting” So being the ass-licking-stalker perpetuated-prodigious-yet-curious-aristocrat that I am, I went Wiki….. so here’s the link I like to share.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fuck

Offended? I honestly can’t see why. It’s something for laughing.